You may not see Ride Ons during a ride if the person giving them isn’t giving it to you during the ride. A couple of examples:
You spam/give out a Ride On to those in your near vicinity by pressing the little circle around your location on the companion app. You finish your ride. The other person(s) finish after you. They see you gave them a Ride On and to be courteous, they look you up and give your activity a Ride On as well.
Your Zwift buddies/friends log in after you have finished your ride. Look you and your activities up and give you a Ride On.
In both of the above cases, you’d never see the Ride On while you were riding. The Ride Ons would appear after the fact. This is normal and to be expected. Give it a try, look up a buddy. Check out his activity list. You can give Ride Ons for any ride going back weeks as long as you didn’t already give him one.
As for Ride Ons in a group ride where those around you seem to be getting them. This also does not necessarily signify a problem. When in a group ride, to give Ride Ons to someone else in the group, it has to be one at a time. If you suddenly see 5 Ride Ons rain down, then someone from outside of the group sent them. Perhaps you weren’t the one of the closest five or whatever criteria Zwift uses to give out the Ride On.
If you’re not seeing any chat/messages, that would be a problem. Try sending a message yourself and seeing it appears on screen. If not, you definitely have a problem. I have only had this happen once.
Lastly, I too am using an Apple TV 4K and an iPhone.